I’m watching 2 Broke Girls and in the last episode of Season One where Max and Caroline attend the gala in hopes of cornering Martha Stewart to try their homemade cupcakes, Max meets Johnny as she’s coming out of the bathroom. He tells her that they’ve gotten far in their careers to be able to attend such a high class event and she responds that they haven’t gotten far at all (in their relationship). She asked why and he said, “timing, I guess”.
It reminds me of how important timing really is, not only when it comes to relationships, but to everything. If we were just a bit early or a bit late for some things in life, our lives could’ve been totally different. And I’m not talking about being early or late by months or years, but merely by hours or days.
Back in high school, I was tricked into meeting a guy named Jay. He was a super skinny tall white goth kid who did indeed live in a creepy house with an energy vortex of some kind (you can feel the energy when you’re there–it was crazy, but real). He had a hot roommate who was Irish and had freckles and red hair…but that’s a different story. Anyhow, Jay was this pretty awesome artist and I was expecting my friend Will to drop me off at home, not take me to someone else’s house.
I met Keera for the first time at Jay’s house. She was tricked by whoever brought her there as well. She thought she was going to the movies. Instead, we both ended up at a house with a bunch of horny teenagers and neither of us cared one bit for them or the hormones. And since neither of us did drive and had cars and could leave, we were forced to stay and meet.
It was by perfect timing that I happened to find Will and reminded him that he promised he’d drop me off at home that day. He was literally about to leave when I found him and if I had been a couple minutes late in getting to him after the bell rang, I would’ve missed out on Jay and Keera and my life would’ve been different. Neither Jay nor Keera attended school where I did (Jay was out of school as he was in his mid twenties) and neither one of them lived anywhere in the city I lived in.
A few minutes late, and I would’ve never had stories that spanned three books about the Otherworld and all those who lived there. I would’ve never had Demonico or any of those characters and all the crazy that came with it.
How much of our lives is purely coincidental? How much of it is actually perfect timing? Timing is indeed everything.
I once worked with a guy who had the coolest name I’ve ever heard of: Zebediah. It’s not a common name. We’d call him Zeb for short. He played baseball and he’d always invite me to his games, but I never wanted to go. He wanted me to see him play, but I wasn’t ready for any relationships. I always turned him down. He was a great guy: funny, smart, old fashioned–perfect…but the timing wasn’t. I honestly can’t imagine what life would be like now if I had said yes back then and just accepted his offer.
Life itself is a series of perfect timing. Everything actually works together, whether for good or bad, to control our lives and move it in a direction that has purpose and meaning.
It’s like hurricane Hugo of ’89 or some time way back in the past when I was still a single digit in age. We had this gigantic tree right next to our house and it was so big and so strong that nothing could move it. That night, it actually crashed into our house and smashed everything. My mom, being scared alone with young kids in a storm while my dad worked 3rd shift, took all of us kids and packed us into the living room where we slept on the floor. We actually survived the gigantic tree crashing into our house and smashing everything into bits. Hugo wasn’t even a bad storm and normally, my mom wouldn’t move us all to the living room, but the tree went right through my baby sister’s crib. If we had all just gone to sleep that night like normal, we would’ve all been dead or in the very least, hurt very badly which would’ve affected the rest of our lives. I would’ve probably never been able to write stories that needed to be told.
I know for a fact that my life is a bunch of hit and misses–anything and everything from good and bad luck, to the people in my life or those who have been in my life, to how I’m even still alive today.
A few minutes sooner, being unbuckled in the back seat of my best friend’s boyfriend’s car and sitting right in the middle with a giant gap that I easily fit through when we hit head on with a car that suddenly made a left turn, I would’ve flew right out that front windshield window had time not literally slowed down enough so I could see what was coming before it happened and brace myself by spreading my arms and legs wide and holding on to the back of their chairs. There wasn’t time to actually put on a seat belt. To be honest, I wasn’t even paying any attention to the front of the car. If time hadn’t literally slowed down, I wouldn’t be here today. And as crazy as that sounded, I actually survived a horrible car crash that put the driver, who had on a seat belt, in a coma for five days. He was hurt that bad. The entire front of the car was totaled. And to make things worse, it was Mother’s Day. Christina’s boyfriend took us shopping to get presents for our moms. I was sixteen.
For some reason, we normally only look at relationships in relation to timing. If I met this person sooner, they would be with me and not someone else. But perfect timing in fact determines every aspect of our lives. Perfect timing determines who we meet, what we do, how we do it, who we affect, who affects us, and basically everything in our lives is measured by a timeline we cannot compute into mathematical equations.
A few minutes later, and I would’ve missed meeting Michael who is the most amazing person I’ve ever known. He adores the hell out of me (literally, although he’s Asatru? I forget.Whatever his religion is, it isn’t Christian) and I adore him right back.
A few minutes later, and Shaun would’ve committed suicide.
Our lives are measured by time. That time, however, isn’t linear. Time isn’t a straight line. It is a messed up web of perfect that I haven’t even begun figuring out yet. Everything in our lives is perfect timing, even when we cannot see the perfection in all the imperfection of things gone wrong and things gone right.